In the realm of intelligent things to do on a Sunday afternoon, I'm not sure pounding almost a half dozen hot dogs is one of them. I am positive its not a good idea when you have traveled over 20 miles to try one of the new guards of St. Louis hot dog joints, Surfdogs, where surfing, perfectly steamed poppy seed buns and Jimmy Buffet reign supreme.
To start, I'd like to share with you the souvenir I brought back from my trip to the Chesterfield Valley - my membership in the Surfdogs Hang 10 Club. In about 20 minutes I managed to "Hang 5", barely, before the ordering stopped and I limped back to the car for the long trip back to Webster.
For the record, I ate half of the Big Kahuna Challenge. Basically the challenge consists of a person, a seat, 10 decadent hot dogs and 60 minutes. According to the Surfdogs website there are no substitutions, no trips to the bathroom and if you hork before your done, I have to assume the challenge is over. If its not over, it should be. However it is unclear if the rules allow you to continue after vomiting. To be honest I don't really want to know.
In any event I would be unable to compete for the Big Kahuna given the number of hot dogs that include cheese, in slice, shredded and sauce form. While I was able to ask for my dogs to be made sans cheese, for the purposes of maintaining the integrity of the Big Kahuna Challenge, the dogs can't be made without cheese.
I think it would be grossly unfair to the handful of people who have actually completed this gut wrenching challenge to attempt it without doing the cheese dogs.
Joining me on my trip was my friend, hot dog with ketchup lover, and sometimes site guest contributor Jeff, who brought along his daughter, who had this face on pretty much the whole time I was eating. Clocking in at a year and a half, even she seemed to know that what I was doing was wrong, and possibly against the very laws of nature.
While I appreciate that she was worried about what was unfolding in front of her, I still had to make the most of my trip because I honestly don't know how often I will get back there.
Hence the desperation inherent in my ordering - as you will see over the following paragraphs. Yeah, that's the ticket.
Here is the rundown:
From Left to Right - The New York Dog, The Original Surf Dog, The Ruben Dog
The New York Dog is a Vienna Beef dog on a steamed bun topped with spicy mustard, giardiniera peppers and sauerkraut. Now longtime readers will remember my issues with "New York Style" dogs both at Woofies and Pam's Chicago Style Dogs. Much like at Pam's, the addition of giardiniera is tasty, but it has nothing to do with New York hot dogs. New York hot dogs come from a dirty water dog cart, topped with mustard, onion sauce and sauerkraut. When they are from a shop they are grilled on a flat top, topped just like a dirty water dog and ideally served with papaya juice. I've eaten hundreds of hot dogs in NYC, and never once was I even offered the option of giardiniera. Now don't get me wrong, giardiniera is an amazing topping. It tastes great on a dog, and even better on Chicago style Italian beef, but its addition does not make for a New York hot dog. You know what does? Mustard and sauerkraut. All in all, a great hot dog with a geographically depressing name for this NYC transplant.
The Original Surf Dog is a Vienna Beef dog on a steamed bun topped with pineapple, tomato, bacon, peppers and swiss cheese. As I mentioned above I asked for mine without the cheese. My experience with this dog started rocky when a bite of dog and crushed pineapple came on a bit strong. However as I made my way into the dog, the mixture of fruit, dog, bacon and peppers made for a downright excellent and unexpected hot dog. Surf Dog, you live up to your namesake.
The Reuben Dog is a Vienna Beef dog on a steamed bun topped with 1,000 island dressing and sauerkraut. Simple and tasty, this was the only dog that I didn't have to ask for no cheese on, even though I think I should have if it was really a reuben. Regardless, this one went down first and fast.
While I was taking down my first basket of dogs, Jeff attacked Capn' Misty's Italian Dog, a Vienna Beef dog on a poppy seed bun topped with mozzarella cheese, marinara sauce (or gravy if you were taught correctly) and sweet peppers. The menu indicates the bun should be toasted, but from the picture it looks like this one was not. Jeff was really happy with this gussied up pizza dog and with the fact that the bun was steamed instead of toasted.
From Left to Right - The South Shore Slaw Dog and The Dog House
There comes a time when you are eating really dumb amounts of food that you decide that you're going to order again before you finish what's in front of you. I blame the menu that hung there on the wall, just staring at me. Three dogs was more than enough for one visit, but as if my feet were taking directions from my sack instead of my highly rational brain or completely full stomach, I soon found myself back at the counter ordering the two gut busters pictured above.
The first, or rather fourth dog was The South Shore Slaw Dog, a Vienna Beef dog on a steamed poppy seed bun topped with a really fresh and well executed cole slaw. Now, I've eaten slaw dogs all over the south, but i have to say this reminded me of a slaw dog that I would make at home during a cookout. The right amount of tang and the right amount of crunch from the cabbage. Bravo.
My fifth dog was the aptly named Dog House. A combination of The Cheesy Dog, The Epic Chili Dog and a South Shore Slaw Dog, this dog is by all measures a problem, or maybe it was just a problem that I was eating it last. First off, without the cheese, it was just a dense and amazing slaw chili dog. I can't imagine this dog covered with cheese sauce, or rather I can't imagine how I would eat it without a knife and fork. Not that there is anything wrong with knife and forking a dog if you need to. To be honest as I sized up this dog, I thought about my brother attempting the Chili Pie at Woofies this past spring and then I counted my blessings it was missing the cheese and dug in.
The chili was sweet and not very spicy. The first bite reminded me of Skyline Chili, as did the second. By the third bite I found myself back in the middle of a slaw dog, with the tang mixing well with the sweetness of the chili. By this point I was not even sure there was a hot dog in there, I was just trying to finish.
Which I did, thank you very much.
Postscript:
As I write this, its been about 36 hours since my visit to Surfdogs and I just finished dinner, my first meal since visiting Chesterfield. Seriously, I was not hungry for over a day and a half. If my exploits don't make you want to saddle up and head out to the wilds of St. Louis county, I don't know what would. Along the same lines, if my exploits make you want to never eat a hot dog again or perhaps go vegan, that's understandable as well. Hell, I was thinking that on the ride home. And while I'm positive I will never, ever, ever attempt the Big Kahuna challenge, I will find my way back to finish out my punch card.
Eventually.
After I go for a run.
Several really long runs.
All dicking around aside, Surfdogs is well worth the short road trip from St. Louis city and worthy addition to the top shelf hot dog joints we have here in town.
